Flights of Fancy Mom

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8 Ways for Single Mom’s to Rejuvenate Their Souls

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As a single mom I have my daughter with me 50% of the year. This would have been less if I had chosen not to sell my home last year and move closer to where my daughter’s father lives. Where my daughter chose to go to high school. With that said, single mom’s need time to decompress and enjoy their time when their child is with their parent. Here are some ways to get out of mom mode and out of the four walls of your home:

Massage: Nothing says downtime like getting a massage and having your troubles rubbed away.  Find a place near you, or, if you choose, further away to get out of your town and feel like you went on a little day trip.  My next trip to the spa is going to include a hot stone massage. I’ve heard amazing things about them and cannot wait to try it out!

Girls Night Out: Whether you go out for Happy Hour after work, or you go out Friday night dancing. As mom’s, not just single mom’s, we tend to put our children first. (As it should be!) But we need to nourish our souls with our girlfriends. No one can do that quite like they can. They have either ‘been there, done that’ or they don’t have children and it’s easy to escape our ‘mom mentality’ and talk about our kids the whole time. Because face it, they may love your children, but that’s not why they want to go out. You can get the standard update on how your kiddo is doing, then you can go from proud mom to woman who is out to relax.

Manicure/Pedicures: What mom doesn’t like to be pampered? When I go for a manicure and pedicure, I do the spa treatment. Let them exfoliate my skin and let the aromatherapy scents surround me and lift my worries away.

Shopping Trip: You single mom’s out there will understand, I am on a tight budget unfortunately. But I love to go to stores to see what they have. I’ll just walk around a store, looking and trying clothes on, even if I know I can’t afford to buy it. But, I will admit there are times that I’ll break down and buy something to treat myself. I work for my money, so why can’t I enjoy buying myself something I think is pretty, or something that makes me feel pretty?

Solo Lunch Date: As a single parent, yes, we do get many days to eat alone. Alone being the key word. So, take yourself out on a date for lunch by yourself. If you don’t want to sit alone at a table, sit at the bar. You’re alone, but people are around you and you can at times join in on another persons conversation. Maybe meet new friends. You can also leave when you want to without having to wait for your friend to finish. You’re not at home, stuck in the same four walls, by yourself. We need that change in scenery.

Time with Friends: Who says you only have to hang out with your friends for a drink or a night of debauchery? Your friends are your life companions! They are with you through thick and thin. Take a time out and have a nice lunch or dinner date.

Road Trip to Nowhere: Hop in your car and drive.  You don’t need a destination. When the kid is away, Single Mom’s are unsupervised! Hit the road and see where it takes you. I did that once, years ago. I ended up getting lost. This was before GPS and cellphones. I had a map and no clue where to even look to see where I was. I came across a road crew, they ended up telling me I was about three hours from my state. Ummmm, whoops. I had to find a gas station and call my mom collect to let her know I was heading home and how long it would take me. But, my head was cleared!

Community Events: Where I live, we have First Friday. The first Friday of every month, my town will close down the main road and residents come and have fun. The shops stay open later, so we can shop, food trucks come in, so we can get dinner and either sit on the benches, walk around as you eat, or go to our local wine cellar that allows you to eat food from outside.  Some community events can also include Paint Nights, Bingo Nights, Live Music events, etc.

Main street row of cars

These are just some suggestions on how single mom’s can rejuvenate and come back to life refreshed. Most of these you will see that while you’re alone, your not alone. You have the opportunity to get out there and be around people, even if you don’t talk to them. Just because we’re parents, doesn’t mean we’re now people who can’t enjoy our non-parent time. I wish I had taken some of these suggestions to heart much earlier.

I’ve been divorced twelve years and pretty much sat at home waiting for my daughter to come home to me. I’m in a new town now, not knowing anyone and have reverted back to this. I had become very anti-social this past year and that isn’t me. Falling into a funk because I didn’t have that time away from my home, or out with my friends. Heck, other than my one sister who comes up to my place for me to color her hair, I’ve only had one friend come over to visit. THAT isn’t me at all. I am usually a social person. So, falling into this funk hasn’t been good for me and it’s time to change up my routine.

What ways have you found that rejuvenate your soul? How do you get through your week and still maintain a life that is not solely about your kids? Married folk can still respond. I’d love to hear your thoughts!

33 Comments

  1. Tiffany

    During my Single Mom Days finding that time just for me was the only way I kept my sanity. I found that my mani/pedi trips were my favorite way to ‘rejuvenate’ myself.

    Reply
  2. Heather @ Country Life, City Wife

    I am CFBC and then married a man with kids. I honestly do not know how parents do it. That is meant in a very sincere way. Kids are exhausting! I rejuvenate by reading with hot tea and long baths. I do love my mani/pedis and massages, too. Hot stone is good, but if you ever have the chance try Ashiatsu Massage. It is seriously the best massage I’ve had in my life. Don’t be turned off by the feet LOL. Trust me it is aaaaamazing! My husband and I try to get away for weekends camping or for hikes in the area. SO important to remember yourselves and that life doesn’t revolve around the kids!
    Heather @ Country Life, City Wife recently posted…When Can I Start Charging For Blog Posts?My Profile

    Reply
    1. Jacqui (Post author)

      LOL. Kids can be VERY exhausting! My daughter is 16 and unfortunately it doesn’t get any easier when they are more independent. I have to look into the Ashiatsu Massage. Sounds intriguing :).

      Reply
  3. Katie Kinsley

    Massages are great! My girlfriend is coming to visit and she asked if we could do a spa day together. Now I have to research the best places to do this together!

    Reply
    1. Jacqui (Post author)

      Get the full package! Massage, Mani/Pedi, Facials. Great day!

      Reply
  4. Darlene

    Massages are excellent for frazzled single moms. If you’re a single mom and cannot afford the luxury of a massage, drop the hint to friends and family that a massage gift certificate would be a great gift. They’ll get the hint. 🙂
    Darlene recently posted…Natural Remedies for Stress Relief to Jump-Start TomorrowMy Profile

    Reply
    1. Jacqui (Post author)

      I will have to do that! Fingers crossed they take the hints! LOL

      Reply
  5. Aileen Adalid

    Ooooh these kind of pamper sessions will surely make me feel relaxed, no matter if I’m not a mom yet 😀 Sure enough these can be great tips too for me to do with my girl friends. 😀
    Aileen Adalid recently posted…Meet, Play & Talk with Niigata’s Furumachi Geigi (Geisha) for Only $26!My Profile

    Reply
    1. Jacqui (Post author)

      Absolutely! Every woman deserves them!

      Reply
  6. Echo

    I think these are great ideas for ANY mom, not just single moms! With that being said, I grew up with a single mom and I know how hard it can be and yes, they do need moments to rejuvenate themselves! I love all of your ideas!
    Echo recently posted…Magic, Fairytales And A Princess Ball!My Profile

    Reply
  7. Kristy @ Mommy Hates Cooking

    It is amazing what taking a little time for yourself will do to your mind and overall outlook on life. As moms we often forget that we are people too and that our needs are just as important as everyone elses. I love to get away with my girlfriends for a mani/pedi.

    Reply
  8. Valerie

    I grew up with a single mom who so needed to do this. I fostered 4 kids by myself but was married shortly after. I have lots of friends who are single moms and yes they need to do these things to take time and take care of themselves.

    Reply
  9. OurFamilyWorld

    These are great tips. I think these tips would also work for stressed moms like me. 🙂

    Reply
  10. robin masshole mommy

    A good mani/pedi goes a long way. I think going out for nights out with the girls is also a great way to feel happy!

    Reply
  11. Alli Smith

    The First Friday event sounds like so much fun. I love the ideas of food trucks, shopping and having fun with friends.

    Reply
  12. candy

    Hubby and I were just gifted a couples massage. First time, hubby was not sure about this at all. We ended up loving every moment and it was so relaxing and refreshing. All your ideas are wonderful ideas for girls night, couples and just for yourself.

    Reply
  13. Kathy Myers

    I did my massage the first of January. I love having a relaxing me day. It helps to keep me on track!

    Reply
  14. Dee

    I am very interested in jumping in the car and just driving. I think it would be a great way to clear my head. Sometimes just getting away really helps you to relax.

    Reply
  15. Sue @NoFixedAbodeForSue

    I find that spending time with my girlfriends is the perfect way to rejuvenate my soul. Girlfriends just know what to say when you need that extra support. But I like the idea of a car journey to nowhere as it opens up endless possibilities.

    Reply
  16. Chubskulit Rose

    I find walking very relaxing and rejuvenating but during winter it’s a tough thing. Going shopping or doing yoga is also good.
    Chubskulit Rose recently posted…Simple Hacks for Hosting a PartyMy Profile

    Reply
  17. Jenn

    Oh my gosh, so much yes to everything on your list. I was a single mom for a long time. I could have used any one of these, at any point and time.

    Reply
  18. Jeanette

    I love all the suggestions! I think a little mom time is definitely warranted. I think it makes you a better parent when you have a little break for yourself. Everybody needs a treat for themselves.

    Reply
  19. Annemarie LeBlanc

    I haven’t had some “me” time in the past few months. The last quarter of 2016 was ultra busy for me, both for work and for family. I think I need to go for a full body massage, a mani-pedi, and a haircut. I miss those pampering moments!

    Reply
  20. Pam

    These are great ideas for single moms, and parents in general. I love the solo lunch date idea. It’s nice to have some alone time.

    Reply
  21. Vera Sweeney

    The first Friday sounds like a ton of fun! So important to find things that help you to refresh your self.

    Reply
  22. Heather Lawrence

    Love these tips! When I was a single mom I didn’t even link about myself needing to rejuvenate myself.
    My alone time was after she went to bed and I indulged in a t.v. show and a wine cooler. LOL!!

    Reply
  23. Heather @ Kraus House Mom

    Every two weeks I go get my nails done, without exception. Everyone knows this so there’s no issue, it’s my quiet time.
    Heather @ Kraus House Mom recently posted…My Plans for 2017My Profile

    Reply
    1. Jacqui (Post author)

      Heather, I used to do that all the time too! Unfortunately finances got a little tighter and I had to cut them out 🙁

      Reply
  24. ricci

    These are all great ways to decompress and relax. Great post!!

    Reply
  25. Amanda

    I absolutely love this. All moms need to relax, but above all are those strong, fierce, and hardworking single moms. I was raised by one and I know how hard she worked to make life great for my sister and me.

    Reply
  26. Kita Bryant

    I sometimes forget to give myself me time. This post gives me more reason to remember it. Great job!

    Reply
  27. CourtneyLynne

    These are some great suggestions!!! Nothing better than an awesome girls night out with the besties!!!!

    Reply
  28. Rebecca Swenor

    These are all great ways to rejuvenate your soul when you are a single parent. I know the massage idea I love and it does take everything away for a moment. Thanks for sharing the ideas.

    Reply

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